Quizzes
Quiz: Daily Bonnet or Real News (2017)
It’s time for our annual “Is it the Daily Bonnet or Real News?” quiz. Have you been paying attention? Sometimes the real news is just as crazy as the Daily Bonnet. Test your knowledge! (Real […]
Articles by Andrew
The Daily Bonnet
Virgin Births Nothing Rare in Mennonite Country
REINLAND, MB Miraculous conception has been cited as the cause of hundreds of pregnancies this past year in southern Manitoba. The Reinland Mennonite Hospital, for example, reported more than five hundred virgin births in 2017, […]
Unger Suspicion
Santa’s Complete List of Naughty Mennonites
Anonymous sources close to Santa Claus have revealed his list of very naughty Mennonites to the Daily Bonnet. The following Mennonites will NOT be receiving presents this year, because they’ve been very very bad! (The […]
Unger & Thirst
Fourth Wiseman Rejected for Bringing Halva
BETHLEHEM, JUDEA The fourth wiseman, Peter Wiebe, who followed the star all the way from the East Reserve, was apparently turned away at the entrance to Bethlehem this week for bringing the dry chalky substance […]
The Daily Bonnet
Grandpa Wiebe Knipses Twelve Twenties in a Row
VANKLA, MB Grandpa Wiebe of Vankla impressed all the Wiebes at the Wiebe gathering last night after knipsing twenty after twenty, and at the rate of a toonie per knispe, earned himself quite the pile […]