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Articles by Andrew

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Embarks on New Career After a Weekend of Gorging on Oma’s Cooking

April 2, 2018 Andrew

LEAMINGTON, ON Local man Billy Fehr has decided to quit his job at the Leamington ketchup factory to pursue his lifelong dream of becoming a professional sumo wrestler. Fehr said he made his decision after […]

The Daily Bonnet

Five Controversial Topics You Can’t Joke About With Mennonites

March 31, 2018 Andrew

Believe it or not, Mennonites like to laugh, it’s just that our list of laugh-worthy topics is more limited than others. In other words we have more taboo subjects than most. Writing Mennonite satire has […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Man Wows Audience with Stunning Performance of that Piano Song You Play with Your Knuckles

March 30, 2018 Andrew

ABBOTSFORD, BC Local man Timothy Warkentin left audiences at South Abbotsford EMB stunned this week after his performance of that song you play by rolling your knuckles over a few black keys. It was the […]

Unger & Thirst

Grandkids Still Reluctant to Go Anywhere Near Grandma’s Plumi Moos

March 29, 2018 Andrew

REINLAND, MB The unveiling of Grandma’s famous Easter plumi moos this Sunday sent Little Erika and Paul Brandt running for the hills and screaming at the top of their lungs. Erika, 4, and Paul, 6, […]

Unger Suspicion

Rare Patch of Smooth Road Discovered in Winnipeg

March 28, 2018 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Mr. Thiessen of North Kildonan was utterly shocked to discover a short patch of completely smooth road in Winnipeg during a visit to the Linden Woods neighbourhood this weekend. “What the hell is […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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