ROSENORT, MB The Loewens of Rosenort have been facing considerable anxiety over the last few years trying to figure out whether they’re Jantsied or Ditsied. The conundrum has caused such stress that the Loewens have […]
STEINBACH, MB Oba, nay! Oh, yo, so the weltlich Englishers at Maclean’s Magazine said Steinbach was “dangerous.” They even put it on a list with Wetaskawin yet! I’ve got frintschoft there and I naver had […]
WINNIPEG, MB Soaring prices at local thrift stores have forced some unscrupulous Mennonites into shoplifting in order to obtain the rubber boots and crocheted doilies needed for bare survival. “When I saw the prices, I had no other choice,” […]
ABBOTSFORD, BC The Driedger family of Abbotsford have loaded up their Dodge Caravan and are currently heading for the U.S. border. Authorities are on high alert, having been notified not to let any caravans enter […]
ZURICH, SWITZERLAND The International Union of Pure and Applied Chemistry has decided they’ve given up on mercury and decided to replace element 80 with the dry Mennonite bread known has zwieback. “It’s one of the […]
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