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Articles by Andrew

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Has Already Planted 25% of a Simon and Garfunkel Song

July 3, 2025 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Area woman Olga Sawatzky, 61, is very impressed with her garden this year and says she’s especially excited to be one-quarter of a popular Simon and Garfunkel song. “Not that I listen to […]

Unger & Thirst

Dill Harvest Early this Year

July 2, 2025 Andrew

SWIFT CURRENT, SK After a nice stretch of warm weather and a lot of rain, the Swift Current dill harvest is already upon us. “It’s early this year, but that just means the pickles will […]

Unger Suspicion

Goat Wins Top Prize in Annual Cuteness Awards

July 1, 2025 Andrew

STEINBACH,MB A goat at the Mennonite Heritage Village in Steinbach was just awarded the Cutest Animal in Southern Manitoba award this week. “I’m speechless,” said the goat. “There was a lot of competition this year […]

Unger Games

Stanley Cup Playoffs to be Extended Well into July Next Year

June 30, 2025 Andrew

NEW YORK, NY Hockey has long been designated a cold weather sport, but not so in the Bettman era, where desert cities are given franchises and the Stanley Cup final stretches well into spring. “Next […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Wears 10 Layers of Clothes to Avoid Paying for Carry On Bag

June 29, 2025 Andrew

ST. CATHERINE’S, ON Mrs. Berg of St. Catherine’s, Ontario has successfully flown all the way to Abbotsford this week without a single person noticing her thick layer of clothes. “Got any bags to check?” said […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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