MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA Scientists at the University of Australia have successfully isolated the origin of the ‘Idiot Hoarder’ virus that is ravaging the planet. “We’ve traced it back to a fight between two men in their […]
FOUR MOUNTAINS, BC A local Bible school is taking drastic measures to prevent the spread of the pandemic by expanding the six-inch buffer zone between opposite-gender students to a full six feet. “We’ve always taken […]
PHILADELPHIA, PA Millions of Americans have been left without a religion to call their own as all the professional sports leagues on the continent have shut down due to the pandemic. “Well, I guess I’m […]
TORONTO, ON It was the biggest payout in Lotto 6/49 history last night as local man Mr. Thiessen won an entire truck load of toilet paper. “When I saw they were giving out not one, […]
ABBOTSFORD, BC The Abbotsford Men’s Crokinole League is taking extra precautions these days and has implemented a league-wide policy requiring knipsers to wrap their knipsing fingers in plastic bags. “We are taking every measure to […]
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