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Articles by Andrew

Unger the Influence

Edmonton Mennonites Big Fans of Mayor Knack-Zoat

October 22, 2026 Andrew

EDMONTON, AB Edmonton’s small but growing Mennonite community has come to rally around their new-ish mayor after discovering he shared an interest in their favourite snack. “Nah, oba, I really had no interest in municipal […]

Unger the Influence

Roundup Introduces New Product to Eliminate Election Signs in Your Yard

October 21, 2026 Andrew

MITCHELL, MB Pesticide manufacture Roundup has just announced a new product specifically designed to get rid of those pesky election signs in your yard. “We’re really excited to bring this new product to the market,” […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Church’s Annual ‘Costume and Candy Party’ Eerily Similar to Halloween

October 19, 2026 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB The local MBGC church invites everyone to dress up like their favourite movie character and come sit around drinking Papsi and eating candy in the church basement this evening. “We’ll be decorating everything […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Encouraged to Get Out and Vogt

October 18, 2026 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Municipal elections are coming up and that means Mennonites across the province will heading to the polls to Vogt. “I’m hoping the Vogter turnout will be high this year,” said local vogter Dave […]

Unger Conviction

Alberta Separatists Hire Mennonites to Show Them How It’s Done

October 17, 2026 Andrew

CALGARY, AB Days before the referendum, Alberta separatists have hired the world-renowned experts on splits and schisms – the Mennonites. “If we’re gonna split over trivial differences, who better than the Mennonites to help us […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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