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Articles by Andrew

Unger Suspicion

Counting Crows Launch New Fragrance ‘The Smell of Hospitals in Winter’

December 27, 2023 Andrew

SAN FRANCISCO, CA 90s rockers Counting Crows have finally released a fragrance befitting their 1996 hit song “A Long December.” “For almost 30 years, our fans have wondered about the ‘smell of hospitals in winter’ […]

Unger Suspicion

Amish Village Wows Guests with Annual Christmas Light Display

December 26, 2023 Andrew

INTERCOURSE, PA Thousands of visitors flocked to Intercourse this week to witness the most magical display of Christmas lights ever seen in an Amish village. “I think the Kauffmans lit a candle this year,” said […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Shocked that Her Poinsettia Survived Until Christmas this Year

December 25, 2023 Andrew

BLUMENORT, MB Area woman Ruth Enns has been awarded Horticulturalist of the Year by the local 4-H club after her poinsettia became the only one in Blumenort to survive all the way ‘til Christmas Day. […]

The Daily Bonnet

10 Mennonites Who Are Spelling Their Last Names Incorrectly

December 24, 2023 Andrew

I know what you’re thinking – “it’s my last name, so I can spell it however I want” or “who are you to say how our last name should be spelled?” And I’m sympathetic to […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man is Just About Ready to Start His Christmas Shopping

December 23, 2023 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Area man Dave Wiens figured he was just about ready to start Christmas shopping and so decided to venture out to the mall in Vanapag this morning. “I know a lot of my […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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