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wab kinew

The Daily Bonnet

Frugal Mennonites Excited for the Permanent Daylight Savings

September 17, 2026 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB There was a buzz in the quilting room at South Kildonan MB this afternoon after the province announced there would be permanent daylight savings. “Oba, I expect savings during an MCC bag sale […]

Unger the Influence

Wab Kinew Returns to Steinbach to Mow the Boulevards

September 14, 2026 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB In what just might be the most heated conflict the City of Steinbach has ever had with the Province of Manitoba, a grassy boulevard on Brandt Street remained totally unmowed for several weeks […]

Unger the Influence

Premier Wab Kinew Finally Visits Steinbach Just as Every Local Politician is Mysteriously Out of Town

September 12, 2026 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB There was not a single local politician available to greet Premier Wab Kinew in Steinbach this afternoon. “I guess they all went to the lake,” said Kinew as he arrived at KR Barkman […]

Unger Suspicion

Trump Threatens to Rename Lake Winnipeg if Wab Kinew Doesn’t Stop Saying Mean Things About Him

August 25, 2026 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB It seems US President Donald Trump has resorted to the most powerful weapon in his playbook -renaming bodies of water. “Starting tomorrow I am ordering all school children to scribble out the name […]

Unger Suspicion

Manitoba to Remove PST on Honey Dill Sauce, Premier Says

March 24, 2026 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB There will be a major reduction on cost-of-living in Manitoba this week after Premier Wab Kinew announced they would no longer be charging PST on honey dill sauce. “On all groceries, actually,” said […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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