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vereniki

Unger & Thirst

McDonald’s CEO Reluctantly Tries New Vereniki Product

March 8, 2026 Andrew

CHICAGO, IL After testing out the product for several months in rural Saskatchewan, McDonald’s CEO Chris Kempczinski announced in a viral video this week that the The Big Pierogi would be rolling out in stores […]

Unger Games

Lodged Perogy Costs Blue Jays World Series

November 2, 2025 Andrew

TORONTO, ON The L.A. Dodgers are thanking a Mennonite baseball fan this week for dropping his delicious cottage cheese perogy into the outfield, which cost the Toronto Blue Jays a potential series-winning run in game […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Discovers New Use for Ketchup

July 14, 2025 Andrew

NEUBERGTHAL, MB After 300 consecutive days consuming his glums vereniki with nothin but Taunte Lina’s schmaunt fat, area man Dave Kroeker, 41, decided to reach into the fridge for the French’s ketchup. “I don’t know […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonites Excited that Parliament is Perogied Until March

January 8, 2025 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON Thousands of Mennonites across Canada were excited to hear that Parliament is going to be “perogied” until March. The new “perogied” status means that Members of Parliament will basically do nothing but eat […]

Unger & Thirst

Did You Know … The Plural of Pierogi is Pierogi

August 22, 2024 Andrew

VITA, MB The National Committee for the Proliferation of Proper Food Spelling has issued a friendly reminder to folks on the Canadian prairies that the plural of pierogi is actually pierogi. “It’s not ‘pierogies,’” said […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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