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vehicles

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Can’t Decide Between Shitty Old Truck and Obnoxious Honda Civic

June 16, 2022 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Area man Peter Wiens, 19, is in the market for a new ride and has narrowed down the selection to a rusty old Ford truck or a Honda Civic with a stupid spoiler […]

Unger Conviction

“The Last Shall Be First, and the First Shall Be Last”: Sermon Causes Traffic Jam in Mennonite Town

November 10, 2018 Andrew

MARTENSVILLE, SK Vehicles were backed up for blocks in the small Mennonite town of Martensville this week after Pastor Martens gave a particularly stirring sermon on Matthew 20. “The last shall be first, and the […]

The Daily Bonnet

Caravan of Mennonites Heading for U.S. Border

November 5, 2018 Andrew

ABBOTSFORD, BC The Driedger family of Abbotsford have loaded up their Dodge Caravan and are currently heading for the U.S. border. Authorities are on high alert, having been notified not to let any caravans enter […]

The Daily Bonnet

Car Air Conditioner to Face Off Against Heated Seat in Epic Battle this April

April 20, 2017 Andrew

MITCHELL, MB The Hieberts are a lovely couple with a happy marriage…or so they thought. Since the beginning of April the Mitchell area couple have been engaged in an epic struggle for temperature control during recent […]

The Daily Bonnet

Religious Bumper Stickers Causing Accidents All Over Southern Manitoba

March 6, 2017 Andrew

WINKLER, MB A legion of bumper sticker-laden pickup trucks and minivans across southern Manitoba are causing traffic accidents throughout the region as people strain to read the Bible verses or inspirational messages. “I was just reading […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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