The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

santa claus

The Daily Bonnet

‘Twas the Night Before Mennonite Christmas

December 20, 2020 Andrew

‘Twas the night before Mennonite Christmas, when all through the house Not a Penner was stirring, not even Uncle Klaus; The tutjes were all eaten, the halva was all gone, I was lying next to […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Children Leave Plate of Vereniki and Schmaunt Fat for Santa

December 24, 2019 Andrew

REINLAND, MB The Broesky children of Reinland were sick and tired of the mediocre gifts that Santa brought when they left out milk and cookies, and so decided to change things up a little this […]

Unger Suspicion

Santa’s Complete List of Naughty Mennonites

December 23, 2017 Andrew

Anonymous sources close to Santa Claus have revealed his list of very naughty Mennonites to the Daily Bonnet. The following Mennonites will NOT be receiving presents this year, because they’ve been very very bad! (The […]

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Mennonite Woman Clings Tightly to Casserole as Husband Drives to Potluck
    September 3, 2022
  • Mennonite Dating Site Guarantees a Menno Match!
    April 15, 2019
  • Authorities Seize Mennonite Woman’s Dangerous Looking Pickle Spears
    March 24, 2024
  • Salt Lake City NHL Team Unveils New Uniforms
    April 14, 2024
  • Study: ‘Not All Mennonites Are Dicks’
    August 13, 2018

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved