The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

crokinole

The Daily Bonnet

Mr. Penner Flicks For Triple Word Score

July 31, 2026 Andrew

BLUMENORT, MB Normally Mr. Penner can be pretty confident that he’ll come out on top anytime the knipsbrat board is placed in front of him. But a mixup with the knipsers this afternoon really had […]

Unger Games

New Season of ‘Heated Rivalry’ to Feature Manitoba’s Top Crokinole Players

January 17, 2026 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Producers of the hit TV romance Heated Rivalry have already announced a change for season two–rather than a romance between two hockey players, the next season will feature two of Manitoba’s top knipsers. […]

Unger the Influence

Goertzen to Spend Retirement Years Playing High Stakes Competitive Crokinole

December 10, 2025 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Longtime Steinbach MLA Kelvin Goertzen announced this week that he will not be seeking re-election in the next provincial election. Instead, Goertzen intends to spend his retirement years singing tenor in a country […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonites Have No Place to Store their Crokinole Pieces After Crown Royal Plant Shuts Down

December 1, 2025 Andrew

ST. CATHERINES, ON Thousands of Mennonites across Ontario have joined Premier Doug Ford in dumping all the Crown Royal they weren’t intending on drinking anyway. “I use it for cooking or medicinal purposes only,” said […]

Unger Games

20-Knipser Pileup Just Outside Blumenort

November 9, 2025 Andrew

BLUMENORT, MB Bad weather this weekend led to a massive pileup of knipsers in the Blumenort church basement multi-purpose room. “First there were just one or two knipsers in the 15-point zone, but it didn’t […]

Posts pagination

1 2 … 7 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Dutch Blitz Players Now Required to Wear Full Body Armour
    June 13, 2017
  • Mennonite Town Holds Massive Parade to Honour Local Man Who Did the Dishes
    May 29, 2020
  • Astronauts Return to Earth After 9 Months Trapped in Conversation at Mennonite Couple’s Doorway
    March 18, 2025
  • Retailers Quick to Cash In as Foot Washing Becomes Latest Gen Z Trend
    February 17, 2024
  • Carney Sends Mennonite Delegates to Negotiate with the EU
    September 16, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved