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alberta

Unger the Influence

Pierre Poilievre Scambling to Learn Plautdietsch to Serve His New Riding

August 22, 2025 Andrew

STETTLER, AB Conservative leader and new Battle River-Crowfoot MP Pierre Poilievre has been taking Plautdietsch lessons in the small Mennonite town of Stettler, Alberta this week. This after several constituents greeted him with, “kjenn jie […]

The Daily Bonnet

Canadian Tire Introduces New ‘Brooks, Alberta’ Scented Air Fresheners

August 21, 2025 Andrew

BROOKS, AB A new line of air fresheners is taking the nation by storm. They’re called “Brooks, Alberta” fresheners and are offered exclusively at Co-op gas bars and Canadian Tire. “Don’t know what it smells […]

Unger the Influence

Pierre Poilievre Spotted Parachuting into Tofield, Alberta

August 19, 2025 Andrew

TOFIELD, AB Conservative leader Pierre Poilievere has parachuted into the small Mennonite town of Tofield, Alberta this afternoon, where he landed just outside Tilly’s Family Dining. “We love a good aerial performance around here,” said […]

Unger the Influence

Alberta Introduces New “School-Appropriate” Bibles Without ‘Song of Solomon’

July 11, 2025 Andrew

EDMONTON, AB In an effort to “balance religious freedoms with the need to protect our children,” the Alberta Ministry of Edumacation has decided to churn out snazzy new Bibles that exclude anything that might be […]

Unger the Influence

Danielle Smith Announces $334 Billion Plan to Drill for Essential Oils

November 13, 2023 Andrew

EDMONTON, AB Alberta Premier Danielle Smith has just announced a new $334 billion investment in essential oil-drilling, contingent on Alberta getting out of the Canada Pension Plan. “We can handle your pension money. Just trust […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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