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Unger the Influence

MLA Caught Using Cell Phone Forced to Pick it Up in Wab Kinew’s Office

September 10, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Sources won’t tell us if it was Kelvin Goertzen or Josh Guenther or even Carrie Hiebert. All we know is that one MLA was caught using a cell phone in the legislature this […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Spends 8 Hours Trying to Extract Stubborn Pickles at Top of Jar

September 9, 2024 Andrew

COALDALE, AB Area woman Diane Toews got up early this morning knowing she was going to need a bit of extra time to extract the pickles, but it was all for naught. “Faspa was over […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Tries to Pass Off Farmer Sausage as Kubasa

September 8, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Jake Reimer’s attempt at serving his guests “kubasa” this weekend utterly failed after he figured he could toss a clove of garlic in with the farmer sausage and fool everyone. “He thought a […]

Unger Games

Eagles Introduce New Uniform for Brazil NFL Game

September 7, 2024 Andrew

SAO PAOLO, BRAZIL Banned from wearing green, the Philadelphia Eagles have unveiled new uniforms for their upcoming game in Sao Paolo this week. “The feather boas might be a bit of a hindrance,” said ESPN […]

Unger Games

Team That Wins Barely Half Their Games Clearly the Best in the League

September 6, 2024 Andrew

PHILADELPHIA, PA The Phillies are in class by themselves this year after winning a little bit over half their games so far this year. “I’ve never see a team dominate like this before,” said baseball […]

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