The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman to Smother Relatives with Wet Kisses at this Afternoon’s Gathering

December 26, 2019 Andrew

CHILLIWACK, BC Mrs. Penner, 71, plans to slobber all over each and every member of the Penner family at the gathering in the basement of the MB church in Chilliwack this afternoon. “Watch out, Penners, […]

Quizzes

It is Real News or the Daily Bonnet? 2019 Edition!

December 25, 2019 Andrew

It’s time for the annual Daily Bonnet Christmas quiz. We’ll give you fifteen headlines and you identify which ones were real (from Steinbachonline, the Carillon, Mennonite World Review, CBC, The New Yorker, or anything yet) […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Children Leave Plate of Vereniki and Schmaunt Fat for Santa

December 24, 2019 Andrew

REINLAND, MB The Broesky children of Reinland were sick and tired of the mediocre gifts that Santa brought when they left out milk and cookies, and so decided to change things up a little this […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman to Play Evie’s ‘Come On, Ring Those Bells’ All Day Today

December 23, 2019 Andrew

BLUMENORT, MB Mrs. Bergmann of Blumenort plans to play Evie’s ‘Come On, Ring Those Bells’ non-stop for the next 48 to 76 hours. “I’ve still got the LP I bought when I was in high […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Woman Sings the Wrong Version of ‘Away in a Manger’

December 22, 2019 Andrew

CHILLIWACK, BC A fight broke out during an Epp gathering in the church basement this week after Grandma Epp insisted on singing the wrong version of ‘Away in a Manger.’ “Diewel, that woman. She just […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 424 425 426 … 733 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • ’25 Minutes to Steinbach’ Sign Fails to Withstand Scientific Testing
    April 3, 2017
  • Maxime Bernier Spotted Parachuting Above Winkler, Manitoba
    May 8, 2023
  • ‘Mennonite Heritage Week’ Comes and Goes Without a Single Mennonite Noticing
    September 18, 2020
  • Letter to Small Town Paper Solves Israeli-Palestinian Conflict
    February 28, 2017
  • No One Elected to Baseball Hall of Fame Except for this One Mennonite Dude from Rosenhof
    January 28, 2021

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved