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Unger Games

Meet the Plett Brothers: The Last Remaining Fans Still Watching the NHL this Season

May 22, 2023 Andrew

TABER, AB After searching long and hard all across the country, researchers have found two Mennonite dudes who apparently didn’t know hockey was over for the season. The two remaining hockey fans are Jeremy Plett, […]

Unger & Thirst

Winnipeg Police Seize Mennonite Woman’s Basket of Chanterelles

May 21, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB In an effort to crack down on mushrooms in the city, local police raided a North Kildonan home this week and seized Mrs. Driedger’s basket of wild chanterelles. “Oba, Harry and I had […]

Daily Bonnet

Moving Day Quickly Devolves into Petty Competition to See Which Insecure Mennonite Man Can Carry the Most Boxes at Once

May 20, 2023 Andrew

LA CRETE, AB It was moving day for the Krahns of La Crete and you know what that means – a semi-regular gathering of insecure Mennonite men trying to outdo each other by carrying the […]

Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Brings Shame to the Entire Friesen Clan by Clapping Between Movements

May 19, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Area man Dan Friesen, 51, sullied the good name of the Friesens this week after clapping between movements during a performance of the Manitoba Chamber Orchestra. “Well, pardon me for showing my appreciation […]

Unger & Thirst

Jello Fruit Salad Proves Too Tempting for Mennonite Man

May 17, 2023 Andrew

TOFIELD, AB Mr. Jeremy Goerzen of Tofield, Alberta could not resist the siren call of Jello fruit salad this week and wound up hospitalized with a “really awfully tummy ache.” “Oi yoi yoi, that was […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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