AYLMER, ON
Area man Johan Dyck ran out of space on his census form this week after being asked to list all 31 children.
“I got Mary, Isaac, Peter, Susie, Abe, David, Heinrich, Anne, Ruth, Carol, Andreas, Klaas, Dietrich, Adam, Richard, and George,” explained Johan. “But I had no room for Esther, Lina, Tina, Wilhelm, Martin, Samuel, Justina, Aganetha, Rebecca, Elizabeth or Sarah.”
Johan had to call up Statistics Canada to get a second form.
“And that’s just the ones from my first wife. Rest in peace,” said Johan. “I haven’t even counted all the kjina from my new wife. We’ve been married just over a year and I think there’s 6 or 7 already.”
Johan says he also had trouble listing all his sources of income, which include mushroom picking, school bus driving, farming, teaching Sunday School, and importing real Mexican vanilla.
“Us Mennonites have never been afraid of a little hard work,” said Johan. “But I’ve never worked so hard as I have trying to figure out all my children’s names.”
Meanwhile, the church elders are already considering excommunicating Johan for committing the grave sin of filling out the census.
(photo credit: by hsingy/CC)