The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

Unger & Thirst

Unger & Thirst

US Troops Accidentally Seize One of Those Oil and Vinegar Tasting Rooms

January 5, 2026 Andrew

GOESSEL, KS Rural Kansas’s most popular oil and vinegar tasting room was accidentally seized this weekend as the Trump administration tries to regain control over the hemisphere’s most precious commodity. “We’ve got their oil and […]

Unger & Thirst

Winkler, Manitoba Officially Has More Mexican Restaurants than People

January 2, 2026 Andrew

WINKLER, MB According to new census figures that were just released today, the city of Winkler in southern Manitoba now has more Mexican restaurants than people. At just over 14,000 Mexican restaurants, the city has […]

Unger & Thirst

Lottery Winner Given Rare Box of Christmas Oranges That Aren’t Stale or Rotten

December 26, 2025 Andrew

ALTONA, MB A small ceremony was held at the Altona Co-op this afternoon where Mrs. Neufeld was awarded a box of non-rotten and non-stale Christmas origins. “Wow, did you see that?” said Mrs. Kroeker, completely […]

Unger & Thirst

All Steinbach Restaurants to Serve Nothing but Pizza from Now On

December 16, 2025 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB “If there’s one thing Steinbach lacks, it’s pizza restaurants,” said local man Mr. Bueckert. “I mean, if I want to order pizza I need at least thirty or forty options rather than the […]

Unger & Thirst

Mrs. Friesen Rushes Inside to Avoid Freezing Her Buns

December 4, 2025 Andrew

GRETNA, MB Mrs. Helena Friesen had a leftover plate of raisin buns from the funeral this afternoon, which required her to hightail it to her Honda CRV lest she freeze her buns off. “Jauma, it’s […]

Posts pagination

1 2 … 137 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Bargain-Hungry Mennonites Fill Arena for 50 Cent Concert
    September 13, 2023
  • Swift Current Residents Furious at Taylor Swift for Leaving Their City Off Her 2025 Tour
    June 22, 2023
  • Michael Phelps Spotted at Local Gravel Pits
    September 1, 2016
  • Grandma Friesen Totally Schools Grandchildren in Plautdietsch Scrabble Match
    August 20, 2017
  • Stop Playing God! 7 Ways You’re Playing God Without Even Realizing It!
    August 3, 2021

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved