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Unger Conviction

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Choir to Perform at Extra-Alternative Halftime Show

February 8, 2026 Andrew

FRESNO, CA For those looking for an alternative halftime show to either Bad Bunny or Kid Rock, the Fresno Central Mennonite Church is inviting guests to listen to their choir this afternoon. “We felt that […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Man Gets Standing Ovation in Switzerland

January 22, 2026 Andrew

DAVOS, SWITZERLAND An unexpected speech from the first man to rebaptize someone as an adult, drew a standing ovation at the World Economic Forum in Switzerland this week. “Wow, that’s quite the reception,” said Conrad […]

Unger Conviction

Dunkers Switch to Pouring After Water Main Break in Calgary

December 31, 2025 Andrew

CALGARY, AB All 7 Mennonite Brethren churches in Calgary have changed their mode of baptism this week after a main break significantly reduced water supply in the city. “We’re just doing our part,” said Pastor […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Church Under Fire After Releasing Heavily Redacted Church Bulletin

December 22, 2025 Andrew

EPSTEINBACH, MB A local Mennonite church is facing a lot of criticism this week after the Sunday bulletin was released in a heavily redacted form. “All 4 pages were blacked out,” said Mrs. Loewen, who […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Pastor Stocks up for Communion

December 19, 2025 Andrew

LEAMINGTON, ON Pastor Pete noticed the church was running low on Welch’s this week and decided to take the truck over to the superstore for some non-alcoholic communion juice. “I’m also stocking up in Ritz […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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