WASHINGTON, DC President Musk has been so busy haphazardly cutting government workers that he inadvertently fired himself this afternoon. “And the problem is it all happened so fast that now I can’t even hire myself […]
HARRISONBURG, VA After opening up their hymnals for the first time in several years, parishioners at the Central Harrisonburg Mennonite Church were mortified to discover that they’d totally changed nearly every single word in the […]
WINKLER, MB Winkler is finally getting its own Costco store, which will be conveniently located just an hour and a half away in Winnipeg. “Finally, Winkler’s getting a Costco!” proclaimed local man John Penner. “It’s […]
BAKER COLONY, MB After dominating play throughout southern Manitoba in recent years, a Hutterite women’s hockey team has signed on as a last minute addition to the NHL’s 4 Nations Face-Off. “We’re calling it 5 […]
TORONTO, ON Things got pretty heated at a Toronto church this Sunday morning after a group of Mennonites started booing right in the middle of Hymn 606. “It’s the Mennonite anthem, right?” said attendee Jakob […]
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