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Articles by Andrew

Unger the Influence

“I meant hot dogs and catsup,” claims candidate

September 13, 2024 Andrew

PHILADELPHIA, PA A US Presidential candidate is now claiming he was talking about “hot dogs and catsup” and that the media is just twisting his words to make him look bad. “I like a good […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Finally Have their Own Section at the Bookstore

September 12, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB A prominent sign has been installed at Winnipeg’s favourite bookstore McNally Robinson that points costumers to the bargain section. “Finally a section for us Mennonites,” said book lover Erin Neufeld. “Got to get […]

Unger the Influence

MLA Caught Using Cell Phone Forced to Pick it Up in Wab Kinew’s Office

September 10, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Sources won’t tell us if it was Kelvin Goertzen or Josh Guenther or even Carrie Hiebert. All we know is that one MLA was caught using a cell phone in the legislature this […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Spends 8 Hours Trying to Extract Stubborn Pickles at Top of Jar

September 9, 2024 Andrew

COALDALE, AB Area woman Diane Toews got up early this morning knowing she was going to need a bit of extra time to extract the pickles, but it was all for naught. “Faspa was over […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Tries to Pass Off Farmer Sausage as Kubasa

September 8, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Jake Reimer’s attempt at serving his guests “kubasa” this weekend utterly failed after he figured he could toss a clove of garlic in with the farmer sausage and fool everyone. “He thought a […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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