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Month: April 2021

Unger Suspicion

‘Tooth & Nail’ Band Books Thirty Night Residency in Baptist Church Basement

April 5, 2021 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Local punk rocker Sam Dyck, 39, of Kleefeld, Manitoba is really excited that his favourite 90s Christian pop punk band The Undecided have booked a long term residency in the Southdale Baptist basement […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Reads Through the Entire Bible Just Driving Back and Forth Between Winkler and Morden

April 4, 2021 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Klaas Bergmann, 57, of Plum Coulee has successfully completed his goal of reading through the entire Bible in a year simply by driving back and forth on Highway 14. “I made it through […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Mostly Just in it for the Icing and Sprinkles

April 3, 2021 Andrew

WINKLER, MB For Jack Klassen of Winkler, the faintly lemon-tasting bun of paska is secondary compared to the icing and sprinkles. “Basically, the bun is a receptacle for transporting icing and sprinkles to my mouth,” […]

Unger & Thirst

How old were you when you first began to like borscht?

April 2, 2021 Andrew

As a child of the 1980s, I grew up primarily on Chicken McNuggets with sweet and sour sauce (or barbecue if I’d been good that week), so it was only later in life that I […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Family Looking Forward to Delightful Illegal Gathering this Easter

April 1, 2021 Andrew

SCHRATJLIJCH, MB Plans are already in the works for a delightfully illegal Easter this year. The Hiebert family of Schratjlijch, Manitoba, for example, have been dutifully shopping, cooking, and otherwise preparing for their first illegal […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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