The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

security

Unger Suspicion

Volkswagen Replaces Key Fob With Giant Red Panic Button

August 18, 2024 Andrew

WOLFSBURG, GERMANY Disappointed that not enough people were accidentally setting off their car alarms, Volkswagen has replaced the entire key fob with one giant red panic button. “Customers were complaining that the placement of the […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Strip Searched at Airport; Security Shocked at What they Found!

July 10, 2018 Andrew

VANCOUVER, BC Mr. Klassen of Yarrow, BC was selected for random screening at the Vancouver Airport this past week. Mr. Klassen had been heading to visit frintschoft in Kansas, when he was pulled aside for […]

The Daily Bonnet

City to Replace Surveillance Cameras with Mennonite Ladies

March 18, 2017 Andrew

LANCASTER, PA In an effort to increase security and reduce costs of surveillance, the city of Lancaster has voted to remove all security cameras and replace them with nosy Mennonite ladies. “Basically they’ll just do […]

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Grandma Rescued After Literally Knitting Herself Into a Corner
    August 7, 2016
  • New Reports Claims Children Just Faking It, Most Absolutely Love Broccoli and Brussels Sprouts
    June 4, 2022
  • Special Number is Not All That Special
    February 8, 2017
  • Plastic Straw Ban Leaves Pacifist Mennonites Completely Defenceless
    June 21, 2018
  • Learn the Meaning Behind Your Common Mennonite First Name (Men’s List)
    April 14, 2017

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved