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politics

Unger the Influence

Area Man Single-handedly Turns Tide of Election By Posting Meme

April 28, 2025 Andrew

WATERLOO, ON Area man Richard Epp, 71, has single-handedly turned the tide of the entire federal election after posting a political meme that got three likes this afternoon. “Well, three likes and an angry face,” […]

Unger Conviction

Lukewarm Christian Has Only One Conservative Sign in His Yard

April 25, 2025 Andrew

NIVERVILLE, MB Rumours are swirling this week after area man Dave Dueck demonstrated an insufficient level of enthusiasm for the Conservative Party of Canada. “Everyone else has Ted Falk signs popping up like weeds,” said […]

Unger the Influence

Politicians Eager to Dupe Mennonites into Thinking they Support Mennonite Values

April 7, 2025 Andrew

WAUTDESCHISSJAT, SK Politicians across Canada are eagerly courting the Mennonite vote by wording things in such a way that sounds kind of Mennonite when they say it. “I’m not actually changing my policies at all, […]

Unger the Influence

Mennonite Farmer Hires Pierre Poilievre to Count His Chickens Before they’re Hatched

April 2, 2025 Andrew

GRUNTHAL, MB Area poultry producer Garth Broesky has reached out to Conservative leader Pierre Poilievre to come on down to Grunthal and help him count all his chickens before they’re hatched. “He was getting so […]

Unger the Influence

Progressives Find Themselves in Awkward Position of Having to Say Nice Things About a Banker

March 31, 2025 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON It came out of nowhere, but left-leaning liberals and progressives across Canada are suddenly huge fans of bankers. Banker-mania is sweeping the nation, some even going so far as sporting Mark Carney-inspired haircuts. […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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