The Daily Bonnet
Your 2025 Mennonite Oscar Nominees
It’s that time of year again once yet. The Oscars! Well, of course, as Mennonite we don’t watch movies, except we all know Onkel Oscar who owns a TV behind the barn out back and […]
The Daily Bonnet
Mennonites Excited for New ‘Nut Kroeker’ Ballet
WINNIPEG, MB After centuries of strict opposition to dancing of any sort, a new radical sect of Mennonites is set to perform the world’s first Anabaptist ballet – the Nut Kroeker. “It will surely become […]
Unger Suspicion
Winnipeg Road Workers Out Installing Fresh New Potholes
WINNIPEG, MB It’s that time of year again. Construction crews are out in earnest this week trying to keep up with the demand for new 2025 potholes. “It’s a lot of work,” said veteran road […]
Unger Conviction
Church Attendance Takes Huge Hit After Pastor Excommunicates Anyone Who Doesn’t Reply to His Email
CORN, OK Pastor Mark’s new “accountability and discipleship plan” has totally backfired, after not a single parishioner replied to his email asking them to keep track of their hours of Bible reading and service. “I’ve […]
Unger the Influence
Uncle Disappointed that His Incessant Political Posts Go Totally Unappreciated
MT. REINTHAL, TX Uncle Dave has been posting 7 to 10 political memes every day now for the past 10 years or so and can’t for the life of him figure out why no one […]