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Unger Suspicion

Unger Games

Winnipeg Jets Players Required to Sleep with Plastic Sheets on their Beds

April 12, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB After yet another horrid performance tonight, the mothers of all the Winnipeg Jets players have required their sons to sleep with plastic sheets on their beds from now on. “I know they’re grown […]

Unger Suspicion

Water Softener Salt Sits at Door for Months

April 8, 2019 Andrew

MITCHELL, MB Three bags of water softening salt have been sitting at the front door of the Unrau residence in Mitchell for the past three months. The bags were supposed to have been brought downstairs […]

Unger Games

Angry Mennonite Hockey Fan Can’t Figure Out “Waut de schissjat is wrong with those Jats yet!”

April 7, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Local hockey fan Mr. Kehler, who owns three acres just off Henderson Highway in Vanapag, is sea upset about the Jats performance as of late and expressed his rage in a recent Facebook […]

Unger Suspicion

“Because it’s 2019,” Trudeau Says as He Ejects Women from Caucus

April 3, 2019 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON Deciding that the “whole crazy experiment” of having a diverse range of opinions in his caucus and cabinet was a “bad idea” after all, Prime Minister Trudeau has removed Jody Wilson-Raybould and Jane […]

Unger Suspicion

Andrew Scheer Sends Everyone in Canada Some Stupid Cat Meme

March 30, 2019 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON Eager to capitalize on this hip new technology he just discovered called “texting,” Conservative leader Andrew Scheer sent, like, totally everyone in the country a really stupid cat meme he happened to find […]

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