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The Daily Bonnet

Your trusted source for Mennonite satire.

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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Gather for Harder-Dyck Wedding

November 8, 2024 Andrew

SWIFT CURRENT, SK Dozens of Harders and Dycks, along with their friends and churchmates, gathered in at the Swift Current EMB church this past weekend to witness the wedding of Christopher Harder, 23, and Brittney […]

The Daily Bonnet

Flat Earther Proves His Theory with Bibliography Full of Memes

November 7, 2024 Andrew

CORN, OK Mr. Billy Pauls of Corn, Oklahoma recently posted his “extensively researched and definitive proof” of his flat earth theory which contained a lengthy Works Cited page containing dozens of memes he found online […]

The Daily Bonnet

Hutterite Woman Dresses as a Mennonite for Halloween

October 31, 2024 Andrew

GREEN SWAMP COLONY, AB Hutterite woman Sarah Maendel of the Green Swamp Colony dressed as scariest thing she could think of this Halloween – a Mennonite. “I had most of the attire already,” said Maendel. […]

The Daily Bonnet

Top 10 Approved Halloween Costumes for Mennonites

October 30, 2024 Andrew

Of course, here in Steinbach, we don’t celebrate Halloween, but for city folks who are just pretending to be Mennonites, here are a few costume ideas for the big day. It’s always a risk anytime […]

The Daily Bonnet

Steinbach Celebrates 150 Sinless Years

October 17, 2024 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Steinbach, Manitoba was settled by 18 righteous and pure Mennonite families some 150 years ago, and after all this time the community has managed to remain completely sinless. “We made it. We finally […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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