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argonauts

Unger Games

Blue Jays Sign Ohtani to Hit, Pitch, and Also Quarterback the Argos

December 8, 2023 Andrew

TORONTO, ON Shohei Ohtani is set to become Toronto’s first three-way player this week, after agreeing to a massive multi-year contract to hit and pitch for the Blue Jays. His duties will also include quarterbacking […]

Unger Games

Argos Destroy Patriots 28-5

July 23, 2022 Andrew

BOSTON, MA In a rare cross-border match last night, the CFL’s Toronto Argonauts embarrassed the New England Patriots by a score of 28 to 5. “We were down by three touchdowns in the 7th inning. […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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