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Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Cuisine to be Featured on New Manitoba Health Card

October 7, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB I guess this is what happens when you let the people vote. Farmer sausage, vereniki, and schmaunt fat will be featured on the new Manitoba health cards set to be released this fall. […]

The Daily Bonnet

“They’re a slippery slope to pants”: Mennonite Church Bans Leggings

October 6, 2024 Andrew

COALDALE, AB Lululemon stores in Calgary are under serious financial pressure this week, after the recent crack down on southern Alberta women wearing leggings under their skirts. “That’s where it all starts,” yelled Pastor Dave […]

The Daily Bonnet

Hottest Ever September in Small Mennonite Town of Schanzenhimmelsgruenfeldthalberg

October 5, 2024 Andrew

Schanzenhimmelsgruenfeldthalberg, MB The weather station in Schanzenhimmelsgruenfeldthalberg recorded the hottest September it the long and illustrious climate history of Schanzenhimmelsgruenfeldthalberg. “We haven’t seen anything like this since our ancestors first moved to Schanzenhimmelsgruenfeldthalberg almost 150 […]

Unger Suspicion

Highway 75 Construction to be Finished Just in Time to Start All Over Again

October 4, 2024 Andrew

MORRIS, MB Construction on one of Manitoba’s most important highways is set to be complete just in time for the whole process to start all over again. “Our plan is that by the time we’re […]

Unger Suspicion

Movie Set in Winnipeg Accidentally Films in Summer

October 2, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Winnipeg, Manitoba has been the setting of dozens of much-beloved indie films over the decades from Guy Maddin’s My Winnipeg and The Saddest Music in the World to Matthew Rankin’s Universal Language and […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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