GRUNTHAL, MB
Ever since she started following the Unger Review last month, Mrs. Annie Martens’s Facebook feed has been nothing but vereniki.
“They’ve got me figured out,” said Martens. “Glums vereniki, blueberry vereniki. Close-ups of schmaunt fat. This algorithm knows me too well.”
Mrs. Martens enjoys ogling other women’s vereniki, but says some of these images are a bit hard to take.
“They know what I like and they know what makes me angry,” said Martens. “And potato and cheddar perogies really grind my gears!”
Martens says she caught herself doomscrolling verinki videos for 8 hours straight last night.
“I sure worked up an appetite watching all that vereniki,” said Martens. “My only wish is that I can get my Harry to stop watching all those knackzoat videos.”