WINNIPEG, MB
Inspired by goalie Connor Helleybuyck and quarterback Dieter Brock, the entire population of Winnipeg has requested a trade out of Winnipeg.
“If I knew it was that easy, I would have done this ages ago,” said area plumber Dave Wiens. “I’m asking for a trade to someplace warm. California looks nice.”
Winnipegers are demanding to be traded to some place with fewer mosquitos, better roads, and nicer beaches.
“But keep the thriving art scene and relatively affordable housing prices the same,” said Wiens. “Is that too much to ask?”
It’s not yet known who the province will get in return once the entire population of Winnipeg has been traded.
“Maybe folks from Regina?” pondered Wiens. “But then they’d have to start cheering for the Bombers, so maybe not.”
So far no one has taken the Winnipegers up on the offer, though Hamiltonians are apparently very interested.
(photo credit: David Stanley/CC)
