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Unger Games

Unger Games

Trump Wins Inaugural Nobel Prize for Soccer

December 6, 2025 Andrew

STOCKHOLM, SWEDEN Not to be outdone by FIFA, the Nobel committee has just come up with a new soccer award, specifically designed for the world’s top demagogues and/or soccer players. The first recipient will be […]

Unger Games

Winnipeg Jets Plan to Lose Every Game Until Hellebuyck Comes Back

November 30, 2025 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Despite a slight hiccup in the plan last night, the Winnipeg Jets are hoping to get back on track and lose every game from now until whenever Connor Hellebuyck comes back. “I’m really […]

Unger Games

McGill Cuts Beloved Crokinole Team

November 28, 2025 Andrew

MONTREAL, QC McGill University has freed up more than $6 billion in budget space after cutting the beloved but expensive crokinole team. “Players kept flicking the pieces all over the place and losing them,” said […]

Unger Games

Local Dad Gets Full Time Job Carting His Kids Around to Sports

November 25, 2025 Andrew

ST. EINBACH, SK Area man David Giesbrecht, 42, has just quit his job at the local window factory so he can dedicate himself to carting his kids around to various sports. “Looks like I’m a […]

Unger Games

Winnipeg Man to Host Grey Cup Party and Cheer for Nobody

November 16, 2025 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Area man Myles Fehr, 71, is begrudgingly hosting a Grey Cup party this afternoon and has forbidden any of his guests from cheering for anyone. “I hope they both lose,” said Fehr. “If […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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