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The Daily Bonnet

Your trusted source for Mennonite satire.

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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Gather in Steinbach for Annual Meeting of Double Cousins

August 16, 2025 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB More than three thousand people packed the picnic shelter at AD Penner Park in Steinbach this weekend for the annual gathering of double first cousins. “My mom and her two sisters each married […]

The Daily Bonnet

Chappell Roan to Settle Down in Modest Swift Current Bungalow

August 14, 2025 Andrew

SWIFT CURRENT, SK Pop sensation Chappell Roan is making good on her promise to move to Saskatchewan with the purchase of a lovely bungalow on Walker Street in Swift Current. “There’s a creek nearby and […]

The Daily Bonnet

How to Slide into a Mennonite Woman’s DMs

August 7, 2025 Andrew

Long gone are the days when a couple might meet at a church faspa or Plett gathering. Instead, the only way to strike up a conversation with a prospective partner these days is to slide […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Author Comes Home with Gold Medal in Annual Navel Gazing Competition

August 6, 2025 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local author Joseph Bergmann, 78, has come home with the top prize at the annual Navel Gazing Olympics this week. Bergmann faced stiff competition from a wide range of authors, historians, and coffee […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Has “Great Jeans” Says American Eagle

August 4, 2025 Andrew

KORN, OK Area farmer Sid Sawatzky has appeared in a really provocative ad for American Eagle this well. The ad features Sawatzky knacking zoat while sitting in a lawn chair with the barn door up. […]

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