OTTAWA, ON
Always wanting to improve services across the country, Canada Post announced this week it would be hiring Amish and Old Order Mennonites to deliver the mail from now on.
“It’s just one more way to keep the corporation relevant,” said MP Joël Lightbound. “We’re hoping to have each letter delivered within 6 to 8 months.”
Canada Post has been under extreme pressure to cut costs in recent years, and hiring Anabaptists seemed like a sensible solution.
“I’m pretty sure they don’t strike,” said Lightbound. “And most of them are willing to work for peanuts … well, sunflower seeds, actually.”
The expected savings did not come to fruition, however, as the Amish quickly demanded a premium price for their hand made deliveries, while the Mennonites refused to deliver to anyone who wasn’t a Dyck.