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Articles by Andrew

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite in Liquor Store Spots Mennonite in Liquor Store

May 22, 2025 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB There was a brief moment of considerable anxiety this afternoon after a Mennonite in the local liquor store happened to spot another Mennonite in the liquor store. “I was minding my own business […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite to Join ‘Golden Dome’ Program

May 21, 2025 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC The White House’s new $175 billion ‘golden dome’ defence program seems bound for completion this week after the administration got the Mennonites on board. “Nah, junges, normally we only have the golden domes […]

Unger & Thirst

Bruce Springsteen’s Plumi Moos Deemed “A Little Dry”

May 20, 2025 Andrew

GOESSEL, KS Atteendees at a Kansas Mennonite church potluck were disappointed this week after rock superstar Bruce Springsteen showed up with a plumi moos that was a “touch on the dry side.” “I get it. […]

The Daily Bonnet

Area Woman Accidentally Posts Something Positive and Uplifting on Social Media

May 19, 2025 Andrew

TABER, AB After months of non-stop angry political posts, Mrs. Goertzen of Taber accidentally shared an inspirational scripture verse on Facebook this morning. “Oba, how did Philippians 4:6-7 get in there!” yelled Mrs. Goertzen. “I […]

The Daily Bonnet

5 Worst Mennonite Jokes of All Time

May 18, 2025 Andrew

So the other day I noticed that Meta AI was posing questions below my articles on Facebook –they’ve been doing it for a while now. Recently, they posed a question about Mennonite jokes. So I […]

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