The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

death penalty

Unger Suspicion

Pope Francis Bans Death Penalty; “Except, of course, for manspreaders,” he says

August 7, 2018 Andrew

VATICAN CITY Pope Francis modified centuries of church teaching this week by calling for the near complete abolishment of the death penalty, except for “particularly heinous crimes such as manspreading and those freakin’ annoying guys […]

Unger & Thirst

Death Row Inmate Requests Mennonite Food for Last Meal

October 26, 2017 Andrew

HUNTSVILLE, TX A death row inmate, set for execution by electric chair this week, has requested a hearty Mennonite meal of vereneki, schmaunt fat, formavorscht, buttasup and an entire tray of rhubarb platz for his […]

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Mennonite Stunt Driver Performs Ten U-Turns in a Row
    October 12, 2019
  • Mennonites Gather at Relief Sale to Get their Hands on Fresh Tea Balls
    May 28, 2022
  • Mennonite Man Breaks His Vow of Pacifism to Defend the Last Can of Pepsi
    October 16, 2016
  • Mennonites Release New Version of American National Anthem, ‘The Flower-Spangled Bonnet’
    July 4, 2018
  • Mennonite Man Breaks Five Teeth on Oma’s Rock Hard Papanat
    November 1, 2018

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved