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Unger Games

Mennonite Man Really Looking Forward to Getting to Bed Early and Finding Out the Jets Score in the Morning

April 24, 2025 Andrew

ARNAUD, MB Die hard Jets fan Darren Giesbrecht, 50, is so pumped for the game tonight that he plans to wake up early tomorrow morning to find out the score. “I don’t want to miss […]

Unger & Thirst

iPhone Severely Damaged After Spending Afternoon in Pocket Full of Zoat

April 23, 2025 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Area man Garth Siemens couldn’t figure out what happened to his iPhone screen this afternoon. “I was just sitting there watching the first church softball game of the season,” said Siemens. “And the […]

Unger the Influence

Left-leaning Voters Proudly Unite Around Right Wing Candidate

April 22, 2025 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON After decades of division, it seems that someone has finally found a way to unite the left-leaning vote in Canada – a Goldman Sachs banker vowing to move the Liberal Party more to […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Wakes Up Just In Time for Next Year’s Sunrise Service

April 21, 2025 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Area man Kyle Berg, 42, decided he’d set his alarm and get up a year early so he doesn’t miss next year’s sunrise service. “Sleeping in is always a risk for me,” said […]

Unger Suspicion

Christians to Stop Killing Other Christians for at Least a Couple Minutes on Easter Sunday

April 20, 2025 Andrew

MOSCOW, RUSSIA “Christian” man Vladimir Putin has graciously decided to stop killing fellow Christians for a full fifteen minutes this Easter Sunday. “This is a time when we pause to reflect on our Lord and […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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