The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

july 4

Unger & Thirst

Americans to Consume More than 2 Million Tons of Baked Beans Today

July 4, 2023 Andrew

HUBBARD, OR According to the FDA, Americans consume more than 2 million tons of molasses baked beans every 4th of July. The volume of baked bean consumption has some officials worried about air quality this […]

Unger Suspicion

Devout American Christians Gather to Enthusiastically Worship False Idol Today

July 4, 2020 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC Millions of pious God-fearing Bible-believing Christians across America are gathering today to sing songs of glory, honour, and praise to the golden calf US flag and constitution. “It’s our most sacred holiday,” said […]

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Mennonite Man Calls Mother-in-Law “Hey You” to Avoid Calling Her “Mom”
    February 26, 2024
  • Thousands Line Up for CMU’s Annual Farmer Sausage Blowout
    April 27, 2023
  • ‘Free Vaccine’ Causes Quite the Quandary for Mennonite Man
    May 22, 2021
  • Naive Manitoba Man Tries to Send a Text from Out by Sandilands Somewhere
    September 6, 2020
  • 7 Mennonite Sisters Marry 7 Mennonite Brothers in Epic Septuple Wedding
    October 30, 2017

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved