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Fans Shocked as PGA Tour Merges with Mennonite Cornhole League

HENDERSON, NE

The news sent shockwaves across the sporting world this afternoon, after it was announced that the PGA Tour would be merging with their longtime rival Mennonite Cornhole League.

“It was a long hard negotiation,” said PGA Tour Commissioner Jay Monahan. “They had us singing hymns and stitching quilts like there’s no tomorrow, but in the end I think the addition of a few beanbags will be good for the game of golf.”

The new league will feature a hybrid of the two games, with golfers expected to put down their clubs and toss a beanbag once they reach the green. Not everyone is a fan of the merger, however, with several high profile golfers such as Rory McIlroy more than a little upset.

“Those Mennonites are going to destroy the sport of golf,” said McIlroy. “I mean the game is slow and boring enough as it is without a 2-hour sermon after every hole.”

The new league plans to begin play this fall, although a few golfers have already said they won’t participate unless they also merge with the Mennonite Horseshoe Tossers Association.

(photo credit: Joe Loong/CC)

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