WINKLER, MB
Winkler, Manitoba, often called the Paris of the Pembina Valley, was the victim of a brazen daytime heist this week after balaclava-donning thieves on dirt bikes took off with Mrs. Reimer’s prized roll kuchen.
“They even took several tin cans of Rogers Golden Syrup,” said Constable Jakey Fehr. “These are truly the crown jewels of the Mennonite world and this theft really exposes the weaknesses in the security there at the Winkler Manor.”
The stolen roll kuchen is estimated to worth upwards of $8 million, but for Mrs. Reimer it’s irreplaceable.
“They’re priceless,” said Mrs. Reimer. “Oh sure, I can make some more, but it’s already fall and we won’t be able to enjoy them until next summer.”
Police have asked Winkler residents to be on the lookout for anyone trying to sell roll kuchen from the back of their truck.
“You don’t want to be in possession of stolen property,” said Fehr. “As tempting as it is, I wouldn’t take my chances with black market roll kuchen.”
Police have already compiled a list of prime suspects, each one a resident of nearby Morden.