Jazz Festival Accidentally Books Jazz Artist


The Faasenja International Jazz Festival introduced their lineup tonight which included two southern gospel trios, a couple hip-hop acts, five indie rock artists, two metal bands, a whole evening’s worth of breakcore DJs, a bluegrass band and, what the heck, a jazz quintet.

“We’re not sure how this jazz quintet got on our lineup,” said event organizer Mr. Janzen. “If it were up to me, we’d never have jazz at this jazz festival!”

For years the festival has had a strict “No Jazz” policy and fans are wondering just how on earth this act made it onto the schedule.

“When I go to a jazz festival I want to see a techno artist or something, not whatever this crap is!” said longtime jazz festival attendee Peter Fehr. “I mean, I think they use like saxophones and trumpets or something. Ugh. I think they might even use an upright bass! Disgusting!”

Festival organizers immediately apologized for the mixup and promised never ever to book an actual jazz artist again.

“We’re doing everything we can to avoid this catastrophe,” said Janzen. “We’re learning from our mistakes and, moving forward, we hope to have the most jazzless jazz festival in North America!”

Meanwhile the local folk festival is excited to announce their extensive lineup of jazz bands this year.

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